The Write Life

I know...I know I've been quiet for a long time. I apologize for my absence. While there are many excuses, I will just say: "Life comes at you fast". There, I like that. So now that the divorce is finally final, I have entered a whole new phase of the starting over years. Yes I've been dipping my toes into the world of dating. My experiences are definitely a mix of the bad, the good, and the ugly.

It's a whole new world out there folks. You may or may not be aware of that, but I sure wasn't. I wanted to share a specific experience for the humor factor. I was out on a date yesterday with a nice gentleman, when lo and behold, my mother and my aunt showed up where we were having a nice meal.

First I have to give you the tiniest bit of back story so you can fully appreciate my situation. My mother and my aunt are both eccentric to a point. For goodness sakes they both own akc standard poodles that are sisters. They both like bling, and both consider themselves cougars. Usually when they go out to eat locally they pick Red Lobster. Enough said? I thought so...Back to my story.

So here my date and I are having a cozy light-hearted meal in the lounge of Applebees. I happen to glance over at the restaurant entrance and I see a woman wearing a red coat. I first thought, "wow that looks like my aunt." It took another ten seconds or so for the light to come on. "That is my aunt!" Horror of all horrors, my mom and my aunt decided to shake things up a bit and eat at Applebees.

When my aunt happened to glance our way, I waved. Yes I know what you are thinking, big mistake right? It was. She waved back with an evil smile and turned around. I could hear her from where we sat.

"Hey come see who is here?" She was alerting my mother to our presence. My mom then peeks around the corner and proceeds to point at me and gesture with her fingers. You've all seen the commercial where the guy signals, "I've got my eyes on you." Yes that is what my mom did.

I turned probably three shades of red as I laughed. This is the way my life works. Luckily my date was very understanding. When we were finished eating, I wanted to sneak off, but instead we went and said the customary hello/goodbye bit. I introduced my date to my mom and aunt and then they let us leave.

Here is the funny part. My aunt later told me that while I was talking to my mom, my aunt was threatening my date with her Russian mob friends near Seattle. Thank god she was only teasing me. She didn't really scare him away like that. Probably just meeting them scared him away anyway.

I really believe I must live under a funny sign or something. Crazy, embarrassing things like this only happen to me. If I were to write my autobiography I would title it: "Did you ever hear the one about...a comedy of errors"

This is my life and I just do the best I can day to day. I will try to update a bit more and keep sharing the laughter as I experience the starting over years.