I wrote strangely fascinating new words, never to be included. I wrote a character’s backstory to bring their behavior to life. Then randomly last week, I lost my niece. I ran into her recently. I am so glad I got the chance for that last hug.
People don’t understand how fragile life is. My niece was here the day before, and then gone the next. I haven’t yet grieved the loss. I found out she was in the hospital while at work, and fifteen minutes later she was gone. I had to work the next three days. Everyone said compartmentalize it, and go to work.
I did, but as a neurospicy individual, I think it may have been bad advice. (I think family medical leave should be changed to allow for all family members, even just for one day. Give us a little time at least.) I boxed it up and now I am unable to unbox it, for fear of how bad it’s going to hurt. This is MY reality.
There is a lot of animosity among the family, and I may be the only one to attend the Celebration of Life, I don’t even know if I’m welcome, but I loved her too. Life is short. we aren’t ever guaranteed goodbyes. I haven’t had the chance yet to say goodbye to anyone that has gone before me.
Maybe its death taunting me, or something more, I am unsure. Hug those you love, and tell them you love them, set aside the petty stuff. (Before you come at me, I don’t mean accept toxic behavior. There is no excuse.) You just never know when you won’t have the opportunity ever again. I’ll be back soon with writing-focused content rather than tearful words.
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